Thursday, 3 March 2016

Treasure in heaven...

As I looked on Facebook today,a memory popped up. It has been two years since I first stepped out on the journey of IVF. Two years ago today I was reeling under the pain of my first failed IVF cycle. I was sitting at home with a broken and bruised body, heavy under the loss of the baby we would never meet. Some people might wonder at this, for after all our baby was only twenty days old. Yet it never mattered how old our baby was or how short a time on earth they had, they were still our baby and we were still parents.

I feel early losses do not get talked about as much as they should. It is often something that is quickly swept under the carpet and many people fail to remember that we were parents once. Our baby was termed a chemical pregnancy, that there was chromosomal abnormalities. All these terms did nothing to comfort me in the grief I felt at losing our baby. We counted each day after the embryo transfer and with every day I could feel more and more. It was a time of great blessing as we grew expectantly along with our baby. Yet the loss ripped at my heart, the pain was greater than any experience I have ever had.

I just want to say to anyone experiencing this or who have gone through it, that we must never feel forced to forget that lost baby. I just finished reading Through the Eyes of the Lion by Levi Lusko and was so blessed by what he had written. Instead of seeing our baby as just lost, I now know that though we never got to meet her or him on earth, they are waiting for us in heaven. We have a treasure in heaven waiting for us...

"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven...for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also..." ~Matthew 6:20

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